Saturday, July 31, 2010

Steak and Kidney Pie?


I am not sure how this happened, but yesterday our family seemed to commit to trying steak and kidney pie. It started out with JJ having an interest. I told him I would look up a recipe and check it out (this is a basic mom defense...if I can't find it, then I obviously can't do it...too many recipes on line, that is all I will say). Anyway the kids were getting excited about the idea. I was not really supportive of the idea, but supportive of the kids. Then they mentioned it to dad. He was not thrilled with the concept. Then true to form, I started teasing him about it...all the sudden a new dish outside of my comfort zone did not sound so bad. The final straw was when JJ turned to dad and said, "You can't say you don't like it, if you have never tried it". Evidentially not only is JJ listening when he doesn't look like he is, he is ready for parenthood!

SOOoooo, I guess today is going to have the chore of finding a butcher shop to find a kidney? Speaking of the actual kidney part of this, JJ at first was repulsed by the idea of having a human kidney in his food. Once I explained to him that it was a cow kidney and that we do not eat humans, he was ok with it. Jeff (dad) is still quite a bit taken back by it. As for me...I just try not to think about that part, and try and focus on the concept of supporting an idea my kids had for getting out of their comfort zone and trying something new and different...very different.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Arthritis?

Well, for a couple of months I have been experiencing continuous pain in my hands, feet, and knees. I thought one day that I had actually broken my finger because it hurt so much to bend it. Other times, especially at nights getting up with the babies, I have felt that my feet were going to break from my putting pressure on them to walk. I have noticed that it is worse when I am tired or cold. I started wearing slippers in July to help my feet not hurt so much.

Last week I went to the doctor for a check up. I mentioned this to him and he mentioned that he felt like it was probably arthritis and that they would check on that (as well as a multitude of other things) when they did my blood work. He gave me a prescription to try and see if it helped. Today was my first day, and it has really helped. The only draw back is that it seems to give me a burst of energy after taking it, and following the instructions to take two before bedtime means I am up at 2:00 in the morning typing. I will have to figure that one out, but it has been nice not having so much pain today.

Well, we will have to see where this roller coaster leads.

Answers to marriage, parenting, and other questions that elude us...(part 1)


How many times have you heard, "The Book of Mormon is the best marriage counseling book", "The Book of Mormon was the best business course I ever took", or "The Book of Mormon is the best parenting book out there" or something similar?

I always had faith that this was true, but I never understood it until recently. I think the clarifying thought was when I reflected on a book that is one of my favorites, "The Five Love Languages". It teaches about how to learn how you interpret love and how you express love. It also has you examine how your spouse interprets and expresses love. As I thought about that the thought occurred to me how do the scriptures (the Book of Mormon specifically) give you better advice than that? Then it occurred to me that in the scriptures not only are you being given that type of information, but you are also having the spirit work upon you (because you are reading His Word as well as obeying the commandment to read His Word). The Spirit will not only help you to recognize changes you need to make within yourself, but will also help to increase your virtue (strength based in righteousness) to make those changes. It has been my experience that as I draw myself closer to the Lord through reading his word and acting upon it (through service, etc) that I increase in strength in that area. He makes me more capable as I seek him.

Another way the spirit helps us is by truly understanding the situation (the "others" involved, whether they are a spouse, friend, coworkers, etc). Sometimes our solutions to a problem are based on our incorrectly viewing the situation. I have learned that when I have a friend who is having difficulties and they come seeking support that I need to not only listen to what they say, but also search for the Spirit's instructions. There have been a few times that I have been able to understand underlying problems to situations, not out of my own wisdom, but because the Spirit has directed me to ask or say certain things that my mind had no knowledge of. When we read the scriptures, we are opening ourselves to those types of experiences. We are inviting the Lord and his Spirit into our lives. When we are at a point where we are struggling, we need the guidance of the Spirit to help us humble ourselves, to forgive others, and love unconditionally. This is one of the key things that many people are unaware of, when we seek change, we need to start with ourselves. Often when we humble ourselves, forgive and love we no longer have the problems we had before. Is this a change that results from your actions, or does the change within yourself make the situation less irritating? I would suggest both. That often times when we choose to act better, others do too. When we change our attitude, many times the things that were so bothersome are barely noticeable.

The difference between many popular marriage, parenting, business help books and the scriptures are two fold - 1. They may tell you what is wrong but they have no ability to help you develop attributes that will help you with that problem, 2. They rely on your ability to understand the problem instead of bringing in an unbiased person (the Spirit) to help you to understand what you need to do.

I spent many years trying to find answers in academia or the media (Hollywood). It was only when I whole heartedly accepted that if I wanted personal peace as well as a good marriage, good relationship with my kids, easier job with parenting, etc than I really needed to put God first. The way that happens is, in part, by studying and applying the scriptures into my life. It is by seeking the Spirit when I am struggling, through prayer, and in my trials. One of the main roles of the Spirit is to teach us all things (not just about God). I take the Lord at His word. I seek the Spirit when I am trying to teach my children patience, when I am working on a free-lance assignment, or when I am not feeling loved. I have learned it is only when I submit myself to studying the scriptures and praying whole heartedly that I find the information I need for the situations that I am in. The answers come differently sometimes while I am reading the scriptures I will read of an example of what I need to do. Other times I have had a random thought enter into my mind that speaks peace to my heart and I feel that it is the right direction to go. And finally other times, I am directed to a specific resource that has the information that I need to make the decision or change in my life.

Now you are probably wondering what about the other people with which you are having the challenge with? What should I do about that? That will have to wait for part 2.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

2 bits worth...

I started cutting hair our 3rd year of marriage. I cut Jeff's hair and did OK. Then we started adding boys to our family and Andrew and JJ got haircuts from mom too.
About two years later we decided to buy a really nice set of clippers. We spent $100 on that set and still have it (going on six years). It is wonderful, well worth paying more than the $35 bucks we spent on our first set of clippers.
JJ and Andrew both had a tough time with haircuts. I think it is normal, but with autism, it seems to amplify the difficulty. Realizing that they were going to need haircuts for the rest of their lives, I decided to try and see if we could modify their attitudes towards haircuts. It has worked well. Some people are surprised at how often I cut the boys hair (every 4-6 weeks), but it has actually made it easier. A bonus to this is that I got lots more practice at hair cutting and I really don't mind it at all.
So here is my youngest boy with his most recent hair cut. I don't know, maybe it is me, but don't you think kids look even cuter when they just got their hair cut?

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Patients vs Patience

For Family Home Evening Jeff decided that he was going to teach the kids about patience. I personally found a lot of humor in this (not that Jeff is not extremely patient, but just that I realized that it would take a lot of patience to teach the kids this concept). I thought Jeff was doing real good at explaining the concept and then JJ jumped in with "a hospital has a lot of patients". Jeff responded, "This is patience - like meaning waiting with a good attitude, not patients - people in a hospital." Then JJ responds, "that is a homophone right dad?"...
Arghh, sometimes teaching seems to be more work than it should be!

Monday, July 5, 2010

Bang, bang!

Well, I have always wanted to learn to shoot (something a little bit more than going out and hitting tin cans), so Jeff signed me up for a class for my birthday (one of many wonderful, and thoughtful gifts this year).

I tried out two 9 millimeter guns (a CV and a Ruger), beyond that, I am afraid I am ignorant as to what types of guns there were. I preferred the Ruger, but the CV was what I used to shoot most of these marks. I was impressed that I did so well. All of the bullets hit the target, many in the main area (worth 10 points). Point wise, I believe I got a 464 out of 500. Our instructor spent about 5 minutes teaching us how to aim the gun. Unfortunately he spent about three hours giving us a lecture about the history of guns, ammunition, etc. I was really getting an itchy trigger finger by the time we got around to practice.

I was real disappointed at my first shot, because at first I thought I had gone real wide and to the right. You can notice on the top right corner of the target there is a logo that has a bullet shot as part of the logo. I thought that was my first shot - I was real embarrassed, until I realized that it was the logo.

Shooting was much louder than I thought it would be, even with ear protection. Our instructor pulled out a 45 and was showing us all the wrong ways to shoot (one handed, not firm stance, hand under wrist, hand under hand, etc). We were standing next to him so we could see how his hand bounced so much, but I felt like I had a front row to the 4th of July fireworks.

During class I had these grandiose ideas of becoming a sharp shooter and possibly competing, until he mentioned how many hours it takes to wear out some (cheap) guns (10,000 hours). I realized if there were people out there practicing that much, than I probably was not going to be able to reach that level. That is probably OK. I don't really think I want to shoot enough to become that skilled at it. Although, I am very impressed that I did so well and Jeff and I are going to go shooting this Friday as part of our weekly date and feel that we might try and fit it in every couple of months for a date night.

RosiLee's not so happy place

Maybe my house is not as baby-proof as I thought! Rosie seems to be finding all the possible "uh-oh" places.
She was really mad at me for laughing and grabbing a camera for this, but I just had to. I missed a couple other shots (like when she fell asleep holding the railings of the crib with her head up against a railing. She had a huge red mark on her forehead for about an hour after she woke up. Or the several times when she has crawled up the side of her crib waiting to be gotten up from a nap, only realizing that she does not like it when her thighs burn from this semi squatting/standing position.)

Saturday, July 3, 2010

A bargain from a friend


I have a friend who is moving and had a garage sale to help get rid of some things and to help earn some money. We picked up this chair for $50. It is a rocker/recliner that is wide enough for an adult and child. I love that I can cuddle up with my kids and read a book together without getting squished (the older three can't really sit on my lap anymore).

Friday, July 2, 2010

1 and 2 and 3 and 4 and...

The kids and I have started an exercise program. I finally figured it out that they wanted to be involved and it was a good healthy thing for them to learn. Besides, they won't leave me alone to exercise!

So we started off with basic stretching, jumping jacks, push-ups, and what I call crunches (they are really laying on your back and pulling your knees up to your chest and picking your shoulders up off the floor - kind of a situp).

Anyway, this picture is posed, but we have been doing this all week and are finding some fun things about exercising. The kids love it when we take turns counting - AL 1-5, Andrew 6-10, JJ 11-15, Mom 16-20, MM - All done. They also get a big kick when we lay on our backs and lift our feet a foot of the ground while I count to five. I count normal 1-4 and then I make 5 sound squeaky, like I am barely holding on. They just bust out laughing. We have even gotten some free weights (I have dumbbells, the kids use soup cans, MM is so small we let her use tomato paste cans) to exercise our triceps and biceps.

I really concentrate on form with the kids because I want them doing exercise right. I am also wanting the kids to understand that we exercise to be healthy, not lose weight (although having looked as some of my recent pictures, I might need to add that when we are overweight, we can benefit doubly from exercise).

Funny story(because with my kids, almost every event has a funny story if I remember to write it down!): The first day I was explaining to the kids that we needed to sit down and put our legs out straight and then reach our arms out to touch our toes. I was encouraging the kids to do this, when I said, "reach out and touch the toes"(my example was a little lacking in that I can't reach my toes anymore). This is when MaggieMae reached over and touched my toes for me. How thoughtful!

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Another birthday gift

My sister took me bowling for my birthday. It was a great evening with just her and I. We have not taken the time to do outings in the last few years, and I have missed spending time with her.

We really enjoyed ourselves, but decided that next time we should only bowl one game...oh, and when we take a picture of my backside, I am going to get a stunt double. That is one of the pictures I will put up on my mirror to give the drive to exercise everyday and not eat too many goodies! Of course now I have to admit that after we bowled, we found our way to Cold Stone one of my favorite, although infrequent, places to indulge.

My birthday

This is how my birthday went. As you can see my kids gave me a pedicure and manicure for my present. I never felt so spoiled! Andrew painted my toenails and JJ and AnnaLisa both took turns painting my fingernails. AnnaLisa and MaggieMae also got their nails painted too.

I saw a friend of mine yesterday and she commented that I couldn't be too busy with having six kids and all because I had my nails painted. That was when I shared with her their gift. At first she thought I meant that they had sent me out to do them. I clarified it for her and she just started laughing. I told her, "Hey it was an afternoon activity that everyone enjoyed!"