Blood work

On Tuesday they took some blood and a urine sample from Andrew.  It was not a pleasant experience, even weighing in that in general giving a blood sample is not a pleasant experience.  Andrew hid himself behind me, dodged, etc to get away from the needle.  We explained it very calmly and rationally, but that did not help much.  Unfortunately because of the stressful situation, the nurse missed the vein and had to "fish for it".  So that made Andrew stress and hurt more.  Today we are doing the surgery blood work.  Great - it gives me so much to look forward to.  We are trying some strategies, mostly distraction to help with the situation.  If Andrew has Histiocytosis, it will more than likely involve a lot of blood work through out his life.

Our current state of mind...

In a perfect world I could call all of you and have this conversation, but this is not that perfect world.  Our son Andrew has had a lump on his head for a few weeks.  We have had an ultrasound and MRIs that show that this is not your average bump on the head.  We had an appointment with an Oncologist this morning and are scheduled Friday for surgery at Phoenix Children's Hospital.  The doctor's suspect it is a disease called Histiocytosis.  It is an auto immune disease that functions a lot like cancer and is treated like cancer.  It is a life long disease that hopefully would go into remission.

It is possible that it is "only" a tumor.

We do know that he currently has a 1.7 cm hole in his skull and that this lesion is sitting on top of his brain.  We believe that it is not in his brain or the protective covering his brain has.  He will eventually need to have a metal plate put in his head.

We would appreciate all prayers.  It has been amazing this last week with just the few friends and family that have been praying, we have really felt it.  In general we feel calm and peaceful, but also feel like this is an issue that is going to be something big.

We would appreciate you all joining us in praying for peace, blessings on the nurses/doctors to be guided well and for our family in general.

Our family has been blessed in so many ways.  We suspect that when we are through this we will be able to see that this too has been one of the many blessings  we have received.

tweener's and dating

JJ would probably kill me for this picture, but this was from his 7th birthday.  He wanted a 1,000 donuts.  I guess I win again for ingenuity.

On a different point, JJ informed me today that he has a girlfriend.  Yes, she tried to hold his hand in church  yesterday and there was reports of a possible kiss.  Hmm, how do I feel about this?  I have to chuckle as I think back to growing up, this was about the age I met my "high school sweetheart" and we grew up a few miles from each other, started dating our senior year of high school and our freshman year of college.  Obviously it did not work out for us, but that is fine with me because I have my perfect match.  

So back to JJ.  We talked about dating and that I felt he needed to wait until he was 16 before he was ready to start thinking about holding girls hands and giving a girl a kiss good night.  Until he was 16 he needed to be focused on developing friendships with boys and girls and figuring out what types of people he liked and would be a good match for him.  

I am sure I sound old fashioned, but as I look back on my personal experience (I started dating when I was 14) and the experience of friends and then later of young woman in my church I was an advisor for, I really feel that waiting until a young woman/man is 16 is wise.  I use to tell the 13 year old young woman that I worked with, it is ok not to date right now.  All the girls I know that got pregnant before they were married started dating before they were 16.  Now I am not trying to suggest this is a magic bullet for all the world's social problems, but rather to let them know that they really need to think about where the choices they are making are going to/could lead.

As a side note, many of the young woman I was a councilor/advisor to did wait until they were 16 or older to date.  In general, they had a lot less drama, chose more stable young men and seemed to better understand themselves within relationships.

Will my kids start dating when they are 16 maybe, we will see.  One of their parents did not date much until their mid 20's.  I guess we will see how reality unfolds our future, but for now, 7 is definitely too young and 16 is not really that far away.

Being a mom without the guilt

There is a philosophy often spouted by older woman or I should say woman who have older children.  The scene almost always looks the same, my kids being a handful in some public place and me counting to ten under my breath and usually to three out loud to my children.  Then some kind lady (occasionally a nice man) will mention to me out of the blue, "Treasure this, they grow up too fast".  So with that mind-set, in November I started trying to enjoy the snuggles a little bit more than I had in the past, did not worry about laundry or clean bathrooms, etc.  If my kids were having difficulty with sleeping I would snuggle with them to help them fall asleep.  After all, isn't a child "sleeping enough" one of my most important responsibilites? The effects of a well rested child lay the foundation for much of the teaching I am responsible for.  Well, this went on for a few weeks (which is in part why I forgot my blog) and I really enjoyed it.  I got to help a stubborn little girl (Rosi) up the stairs by her elbows while she insisted on carrying the towels upstairs to put them away in the bathroom without being capable of balancing herself up the stairs with an armful of clean, folded towels.  Spent a lot of time snuggling with William when he was suppose to be sleeping.  It was all delightful.

I can truly say I have much enjoyed this time with my children.  I have definitely enjoyed the extra snuggles, and playtime, etc that I have had.  Unfortunately there is a down side, when you are enjoying all this extra child time, you might not realize that your "baby" is really sick.  Well, not feverishly sick, but walking around with "walking pneumonia".  But don't worry, he will soon share it with you (or vice versa) and siblings.  So during this time I came down with it as well and endured a month and a half of feeling run down, but maybe I was just learning to enjoy a slower pace in life or I really was "over the hill".  I would struggled out of bed at the last possible minute, but wasn't that normal for a mom who was up with a sick kid again?  I struggled with feeling warm enough.  I really felt cold all the time unless I was under many blankets in bed.  In the morning my eyes hurt to open.  I am thinking I really don't like getting old, it is as bad as they joke about.

When my two sons were diagnosed with "walking pneumonia" which evidently has one symptom - a cough that won't go away - and could resemble allergies to many of us medically uneducated, it was a relief and a clarion call.  I realized I needed to go in right away and get checked out and that all this lethargic, freezing was probably not related to age or sleep deprivation.  Yep, a week later after antibiotics/steroids I feel amazing.  I feel the need to clean toilets as well as cuddle with a little boy who still struggles with sleep but hopefully now it is as a result of having a bad habit of not sleeping well, instead of struggling to breath.  So while I still hear those sweet people reminding me to enjoy my sweet time with my young ones, I can't help but think...I don't mind the handfuls and maybe I can enjoy that too.

PS I am not sure why we were having these donuts in the picture, but that is another thing we have learned to enjoy a little more often than necessary.

Tattoo's

Well, today my oldest (10 years old) came home from school with a "temporary tattoo".  While harmless in nature, I wanted to make sure she was thinking about her choices she makes.  I asked her if she knew why her dad and I chose not to have tattoos.
She sighed, "It is only temporary, I can wash it off."
I responded, "I know.  But that wasn't the question.  Why do you think we don't choose to have tattoos?"
She said, "I don't know."
Exactly my point, I think to myself.  I reply, "Well, mom and dad feel our body is a gift from God and it is beautiful.  If you gave me a beautiful dress for a gift, how would you feel if I took a marker to it to change it or make it look more interesting?"
Shocked look on her face, "I would be really sad about that."
The conversation was enough.  She sat down and did her homework.  She came to me after she finished, with a wet arm and said, "I tried to wash it off, I even used soap and it won't come off."
"Hmmm, maybe try a dish towel."
"I thought you'd say that."  She takes the dishtowel I hand her and she scrubs.  It comes off after a few good minutes of scrubbing.  Her arm is red.
Being a mom who tries to be in the moment and teaching where I can, I point out, "It did not hurt going on, but it looks like it hurt coming off."
She says, "Yeah"
"Sometimes that's how it is.  When we make choices we don't really think about they are easy to get into, but getting out of them is a lot more difficult.  A lot of times our choices leave marks behind.  A real tattoo you can't get rid of that easily."

So what happened to me?

I feel like I dropped off the side of the earth in relation to this blog (for those who don't know, I have another blog to help me track my family history research).  I had a lot of fun in the Ukraine, but I am struggling to finish blogging about it.  In my head I have the entries, pictures, etc. but I just can't get it down.  I think it is in part what I have been juggling since I got home as well as what the Ukraine is.  

Since I got home I have been appointed to two more positions (Secretary of the Children's Sunday School Program in our church and to the GPS Community Budget Committee).  While I feel ready for these opportunities in my life, getting sick and having sick kids is knocking me off my feet.

Then there is the way I feel about the Ukraine.  It is a beautiful and wonderful place and yet it is also a sad hopeless place.  There are so many museums dedicated to remember the travesties of communism/Russia domination (the Museum of the Starvation, etc) that helps you to understand how evil it is, and yet many of the country want to re-instill the former type of government.  It makes me think of the biblical story of the Hebrews being led out of Egypt begging Moses to take them back to Egypt to be slaves.  I mix that with what I see in our country today, and it greatly concerns me the mentality that government is suppose to take care of us, even if that means we become their slaves. 

Having said and felt all this, I would go back to the Ukraine if the right opportunity came up.  I would have a few requirements (like I would have to learn Russian first and I would have to have an opportunity to build up the current situation).  So with that I will leave the history part of this trip undone knowing that emotional part of this trip is completed.  I enjoyed having a week and a half with my sweetheart as well as spent a considerable amount of that time examining the perspective of another culture/society and letting that have sway in my heart.