I saw cute couple tonight falling in love. It took me back to my single days when I fell in love once or twice. I remember the whole, "Will he kiss me, will I kiss him, candle light dinners, late nights, flowers, etc." It was fun.
Now I think of being in love. It looks a little different. It still involves late nights, but usually it is getting up to help clean up a puking child's bed. I know that my husband will be right there with me. It doesn't matter if it involves changing diapers, doing dishes, or bringing in groceries, my husband is always there to help me. To me that what being in love is about - being there for each other - emotionally, mentally, physically... every way. I guess this applies to our children as well as to each other (spouses), but I am thinking of the way we are there for our spouses. When my husband sees me doing dishes, he helps. When he sees laundry that needs to be folded and I haven't gotten to it yet, he helps...sometimes he even does it all.
I am sure some spouses out there have managed to perfect the "dragging your feet until the spouse is done and then asking, "What can I do?". To me this shows a desire to appear responsible, but not to really help ease the burden that your spouse carries. When our daughter threw up the last night of vacation, hitting two beds (she was in the top bunk) at 10:30 at night, my husband grabbed the paper towels and started cleaning the beds while I helped our daughter to the bathroom. That is what love is, carrying each others burdens.
In addition to that, love also involves all the fun stuff as well...kissing, holding, candle light dinners, etc. But that is more the "icing on the cake stuff". Love is what you have when you are truly committed to one another, to each other's well being. It is the safe harbor to rest, to share, to dream.
As I reflect back on my "other loves" I realize that my husband was the first and only man that I was able to truly be in love with. We equally carry each others burdens as well as joy in each other. This is what will always bring me back to my husband, my love.
I have figured out one thing, no matter how well you say it, you can tell you are in love by trying to describe it in words or writing and it will never come out as well as you feel it even though you use the same words that explain it all to you inside yourself.
...besides how many other men would honestly help me clean up the puke?
1 comment:
Well said! Jeff is an awesome man (and so is Kevin...must be in the genes!).
I remember asking my sister once when I was in college (she was already married) what true love felt like. She said, "you can't explain it, you just feel it and know it!" How right she was.
I felt so bad for you guys that last night at the reunion. I honestly wanted to come help, but the smell of vomit (especially other people's) does NOT do good things for me...I probably would have made the situation worse.
But I promise I still love you, even if I don't help clean up puke! :)
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