What is in a name....?

No story about flowers, just about my kids and the names they give their stuffed animals/dolls. AnnaLisa has always come up with some incredibly unusual names (i.e. Lolly, and Fossy) for her loved buddies. My boys have never gone that route. JJ has a lion, tiger, and orange dog (that one use to be daddy's when he was a little boy). I asked him their names and he told me: Lion, Tiger, and Orange Dog. Collectively we call them "his boys" because he sleeps with them every night and we have to hunt for them whenever they have been lost.

This morning I was helping the boys with their morning "getting ready for the day" routine. This includes dressing themselves, making their beds, and saying prayers among other things. I was helping JJ with making his bed while Andrew was making his (on the top bunk) when he calls down, "Where's dinosaur?". I smiled as I am sure he is talking about the huge stuffed triceratops that "Santa" got for him. I look around and don't see it, only his black and white stuffed dog that we gave him 3 years ago (usually called "my dog"). Next thing I see is Andrew sailing through the air as he jumps down from his bed right next to "dog".
"There he is."
I ask, "who?"
He says, "Dinosaur" pointing to his dog. I look at the dog a bit befuddled and say, that is a dog.
Andrew smiles and pointing to the collar that he made a few days ago, "Yes, but his name is dinosaur". And sure enough, Andrew unfolds a 6 inch piece of paper that has two holes punched into so that he could feed through the string that he tied around his dog's neck. He shows me the dog's name, "dinosaun". Then he explains that he wrote the "n" instead of the "r" by mistake but he knows the difference.
Hmmm, makes sense right? You have to account in that Andrew really loves dinosaurs. If I were to drop him off at the public library by the dinosaur book section with a couple of peanut butter sandwiches, I could come back in a few days and he would simply ask for some more sandwiches.

Well, just when I thought my world could not get rocked anymore, in comes my husband. He has "Orange dog" in his hands to toss on JJ's bed. I told him about the dinosaur story.
He smiles and says, "By the way, did you know that JJ has renamed Orange Dog? His name is now "Ambulance".

Christmas line-up

This is a tradition that has passed to our family from the Park line. You have all the kids line up in the hallway and get a picture taken before they are allowed to go in for presents. The older three kids had already been in to check out their presents around 5:45 am. I kicked them out into our bedroom because we told them they could not open any until MaggieMae woke up and they were not allowed to wake her. They climbed into our bed and Jeff put a movie on his computer. Jeff and I went back to sleep (king size beds are huge!).
Around 7:00 we decided they needed breakfast (cereal which was in their stockings), so we decided that we would get those. As the kids left our room, AnnaLisa screamed that MaggieMae was awake, "I saw her move. She's awake." Well, she is now anyway.

We ate breakfast, lined up the kids, took a picture, and opened up the presents(more on that later). I thought the tradition of lining up was kind of silly, but as a Newlywed I did not argue. Now nine Christmas' later, I think it is fun, especially when it is your own cute kids you are taking a picture of.

Memorable Christmas'

This is the third year (we've been married for 9 Christmas') that we have spent at home for Christmas. So we are still trying to figure out what we want to do and how to do it. I have been thinking about memorable Christmas', what made them that way and what I want to do for my kids. So the first main memories I have are related to Christmas Stockings - well actually the contents of Christmas stockings. One year (I think second grade) my parents put a "Storybook of LifeSavers" in. It was a package that opened up like a book and it had 4 rolls of Lifesavers on each side. I thought this was the Ultimate gift to receive. I remember wishing to find that in my stocking every Christmas morning for years to come. The other thing that I wished for were Reese's Peanut Butter Cup "sticks" (they usually have a dozen or so in a tube with a Christmas figure on top). I must have gotten those at least once to hope for them again.

So now I get to plan the whole gig (we pretend that Jeff is involved, but let's be realistic). We made cute stocking for everyone in the family this year. The kids wrote their names on the top. I really wanted to do this for them, but Jeff said it would be cute in years to come seeing their handwriting. I agreed and "allowed them" to do it. AnnaLisa broke her name in half (Anna and Lisa) doing two diagonal descending lines. Andrew wrote, "Andrew3" which is how his Kindergarten teacher has taught him to sign his name because he is the third child by alphabetical first name (who says your not a number to your kindergarten teacher?). JJ decided to go by "Jeff". As far as stocking stuffers go, we got hot chocolate and boxed cereal (single serving size) for the kids. I got Reese's Peanut Butter Christmas trees and peanut butter M&M's. Hope Jeff likes the boxed cereal because I did not think of him (I was concentrating so hard on the kids).

I have two other Christmas memories that run through my head this season (and in truth, every season probably for the rest of my life). The first is of my younger sister Kathy who would always donate to the Salvation Army bell ringers at every store. I even remember that she would donate the last of her money that she borrowed from mom to be paid back later or through work. If I borrowed money from mom I refused to donate it, because it was more that I would have to pay back. But I always remember Kathy and her endless charity. She has been such a good example to me of someone who willing to give others a second chance, share whatever she has, and being kind to all.

The other memory I have is of a Christmas we had shortly after we moved to Utah. I think it was the second Christmas. It was a financially tight time for all in our 11 member family. It was the first year that we traded names (so that we would each only need to get one gift instead of everyone getting everyone a gift). I remember being very humbled by that. Christmas morning was extremely meager. My brother Josh managed to get gifts for everyone - although some were slightly "unorthodox". For me he gave me a dinosaur pencil holder he had made in wood shop (which to this day I have and has always attended every office I have had). For everyone he had something - for one of our brothers he found some lost toys and wrapped them as a present. I don't remember the rest of what he gave, but it was so sweet the feeling in the room at that time. Everyone felt special because of the thought that went into the presents, and not the presents themselves. I guess that is why, for me, the thoughtfulness of the present has always meant more to me than the actual present.

It is a fun time for me to figure out what types of things are important to my children and to try to include them into our celebrations. I hope they look back and remember the fun and joy of being in our family especially around Christmas time.

Gifts

I have been pondering this a bit lately (tis the season, right?). There are a lot of different attitudes about gift giving. For some it is a price tag (i.e. I like this person $50 worth - now lets find something that costs that much), for others it is a representation of something they share with another (a gift that must reflect what the giver is as well as the receiver), for some it is an obligation - I have to give them something because they always get me something, occasionally it is the "I saw it and it made me think of you" gift. And for some people it is a combination of these or other categories that I probably missed.

What has occurred to me is the "Why" to gifts. The "Why do we give gifts?" for? Some will say it is symbolize the giving of the wise men to baby Jesus. I have often thought of that, but while pondering this lately, then why do we do it at Jesus' birth? The wise men did not come for possibly up to two years after that. So back to the "Why" again. We celebrate the crucifixion and resurrection at Easter time, so we are not really celebrating the atonement of Christ (the ultimate gift He gave us). So what are we celebrating? What are the gift to represent? This is when it occurs to me.

We are celebrating the giving of Jesus to us from the Father. It was Heavenly Father's gift to us that was given at the time of Christ's birth. It is through this that we will have the help we need to be forgiven of our sins, overcome death, and become more like the Saviour. So how do the gifts fit in? I think that it is the act of giving when you could have kept it for yourself. It is the taking of something that could possibly help another and giving it to them. This act of giving is one of the forms of love. It is a way to put our love in action. Much like faith is an choice, so is love. We love people when we choose to love them. We make that choice when our actions reflect the choice to show them their well-being, desires, comfort, and feelings are important for us to protect and keep safe.

The beautiful thing about giving gifts to others is that not only is it a way to build a closeness in relationships, but it is also a way to be selfless. It is only by being selfless that we are going to draw ourselves closer to the Lord. It was a common philosophy that people needed to "go find themselves". My thoughts are that we are not out there somewhere to find, but rather we are here ready to be created. We choose what we will be by the choices and actions that we make everyday. When we choose to hold someone's heart gently in our hands, we make the choice to show them how we feel. Whether we realize it or not, our family's hearts we hold in our hands. We need to be careful with the gifts that we give to these important people, not just at Christmas time, but all the time. Do we let them know they are more important to us than our hobbies or interests? Are they more important to us than our laundry or cooking? Are they more important to us than our jobs?

For me, I have found that spending time together is the best gift that I can give to anyone, especially my children. That, done well, is one of the best ways I can build a relationship of love. Doing something the other person enjoys (regardless of whether you enjoy it) is even better.

Little People, important people

JJ loves for Mommy to come and play with him. Actually, he will take anyone, but most times I am his only option. Last week Jeff stayed home from work to finish his final for grad school. JJ wanted me to play with him, so I went into the living room where he was playing. We started playing with "Little People" because that is JJ's favorite thing to play (well at least among the top three). He assigned me the school bus which was packed with people and animals. I started taking all the zoo animals out when JJ told me that it was the "zoo bus". A little bit dejected, I put the animals back in (I mean what fun would it be if I did not get to play the way I wanted to?) JJ got the "zoo truck" and put two people in and told me to follow him. Evidentially, we were going on a field trip.

Our field trip was across the room to the bottom of the Christmas tree. We stopped there at the Nativity set that was under the tree (not where we normally set it up, but somehow that is where it has ended up this year). I left for a few minutes to do something and came back. I found that JJ had gotten everyone off the bus (animal and Little People alike) and they surrounded the baby Jesus. The poor wise men had to fight their way back in (I walked up to see JJ trying to get the last wise man back in the circle). It was just such a beautiful statement that I had to take a picture of it. ***Side note*** - Check out that JJ has the angel on top of a present so that it can be above the scene.

I know JJ was just organizing his world of what was fun and important to him, but I can't help but think of the symbolic nature of it all. JJ had what was important to him right there and was giving it his full attention. He was trying to share it with one of the people who mean the most to him (and I had to run off to go do something - and don't ask me what it was because I don't even remember). What better way to celebrate life, take what is most important (the Saviour) add a little fun to it (the Little People) and share it with someone you love (mommy).

This makes me really stop and think about whether JJ is better at celebrating Christmas and living daily life than I am. He seems to have all the right ingredients and balances them wonderfully. In previous posts I have alluded to the realization that a Mother is (and has the responsibility as) the primary teacher of her children. I think another principle that goes along hand in hand with that is that for a Mother, her children are some of her primary teachers as well. I guess maybe I need a little bit more help than most, because I have four teachers!

Sanity Freak?

So last night I wrote down a schedule (actually more of a reward system for the kids to do what they need to be doing on a daily basis) to help keep us organized.  I made one for the three oldest kids each and myself.  It tracks different things like prayers, chores, exercise (which we can put a star on for completing that day).  Over breakfast this morning we discussed what some of the reward's could be for getting 10, 15, or more stars.  I came up with what I thought would be the "most desired" rewards - ice cream cones, slurpee's and playing at McDonald's playland.  The kids liked getting two extra games on the Wii.  (Except for Sunday, every night we play on the Wii for two games each.  It wasn't really set up for a reward system originally, but has turned into that over the months.)  Wow, I really liked that because it does not involve any cost, transportation, and it is something that I enjoy doing with the kids (you'll never see me on Playland - unless it is to clean up after a kid).

So this afternoon I am complimenting myself on a good job in creating this schedule/system (in full disclosure I give the credit of the idea to the Spirit as I did not come up with this, it simply popped into my mind, I do give myself credit for it only being there two days before I tried to implement it).  Then a thought occurred to me, I wondered if I was a "list freak".  You know, someone who writes things out on a list before it can be accomplished (to some degree I do this).  Then it hit me, I am a "Sanity Freak".  I am an extremely flexible person overall.  However, I do prefer that things are organized and communicated so that all involved can take their part in it.  I strongly dislike not knowing what is going on when my job is to prepare others for what is going on (think "Mom, are we there yet? or When is dinner going to be ready?)

As a mom, if I want my kids to do their part in something, it usually requires me to be a major support for that (keep in mind my kids are 6, 5, 4, and 1).  So any way that I can set them up for success, is less work for me.  After my day yesterday, we needed some serious changes to make the demands on mom less and allow the kids to step  up to their capabilities.  My kids are very capable, but not necessarily independently capable.  This schedule/system is an example of it.  I honestly expect that in a few days that my kids will be doing great once we get all the "kinks" worked out (found out this morning that I now need to put "getting ready for school" as an item to track because when they saw they needed to do two chores for the day, they immediately focused on that to the neglect of getting ready for school - Andrew almost missed the bus).

I know that sometimes I make the lives of those around me more difficult because I require knowing what is going on (when my children are around, if "no kids" I am able to not need as much info).  

I think protecting my sanity is part of my success as a Mom.  I realize that sometimes I need breaks from my kids, sometimes I need for my kids to better help out, and sometimes I need to step in a do it without my kids "help".  What I am hoping is that I still find a balance with it all and that I am enjoying it even though I know that I will have frustrations in the midst of everything.  So call me whatever you want, "List Freak", "Control Freak", "Freak" whatever, just as long as the important things are happening and my sanity is an important thing that needs to happen on a daily basis.

I'll let you all know how the schedule/system goes.